“It’s not the situation, but whether we react, or respond, to the situation that’s important.” – Zig Ziglar
Say you’re driving, and the car behind you honks; what would you do? Do you take time to look around and try to understand why the person honked? Or do you try to think in a way that preserves your belief that you’re a good driver? While situations like this may be challenging and difficult to navigate, our choice to respond or react is rooted in our ability to make responsible decisions. By making responsible decisions, we utilize our power to make outcomes greater for ourselves and others, something crucial to conflict navigation.
In this blog, we will be focusing on understanding responsible decision-making, how to model responsible decision-making as a parent, and steps to equip your family with tools to make responsible decisions.
As mothers, we strive to teach our children how to be responsible, take accountability, and make decisions that help achieve a goal. One of the most important steps to helping our children make responsible decisions is to make responsible decisions ourselves. Every day, we are offered opportunities to make decisions, and understanding the impact of your decisions is key to making responsible choices. When faced with the opportunity, we can take a moment to assess the situation, consider options, and then take action- we can ACT. When assessing the situation, ask yourself what is happening, what level of control you have, and what effect it is having? Next, consider your options by finding solutions to the problem. Remember that solutions can also be boundaries, and weigh the pros and cons of each for yourself and those around you. Last, take action and make the decision that suits those around you and yourself the best. Throughout this process, be sure to remind yourself of the importance of your decisions while also giving yourself grace because, as mothers, most of our decisions involve a lot of gray area, and gray is okay!
Now that you’ve been successful in making responsible decisions yourself, it’s time to give your kids a chance. Teaching your kiddos how to ACT when faced with the power to make decisions is very important as it helps develop empathetic and prosocial behaviors that are crucial to develop healthy relationships, friendships, and in the words of my English teacher, “Be decent human beings.”
To practice at home, you can include your kids in deciding dinner for the night. Help your children understand what is being asked of them. For example, are they coming up with side dishes? Are there certain food groups that need to be present in their decision? Defining the task will help them assess everything they need to think about, what factors they can control, and the importance of the decision they’re making. Next, allow them the space to get creative and pitch ideas. During the consideration, ask them why they’re making the suggestions they are. For all the wild ideas, you can remind them of what’s being asked and the effects of the decision they’re making. Last, let them take action and give their final answers. Even if this process or outcome isn’t perfect, remember that you just empowered your children to make a decision that is bigger than themselves.
Each and every person has the power to make responsible decisions that improve situations not only for themselves, but for those around them. By empowering ourselves to ACT, we empower our children to ACT as well. Mistakes are okay, and reflection is needed! Throughout this week, Mother’s Lead the Way encourages you and your family to each create individual “I can” statements and one “We can” statement. These statements focus on the power each of you holds to make a difference. Together, we can change the world!
Check out some more resources for responsible decision-making practice and deeper learning on your SEL journey!
*T-SEL Competencies: Responsible Decision Making
*SEL & Beyond: Responsible Decision Making
*Positive Action: What is Responsible Decision Making?